Self-Care Blog

New Moon = New Beginnings…

I finally hosted my vert first New Moon Circle, I had no idea what to expect. But I was pleasantly surprised, and I am now equipped with the knowledge and tools that will help me alongside my spiritual journey.

It’s funny really, thinking back; I would have never had the nerve to host such an event that explored my spiritual side. Yet, I have always had this spirituality deep inside but was too afraid to show to the outside world, I felt like the mask I portrayed was what was expected of me and I felt like I had a social obligation to behave in a certain manner. Hiding anything different, my spiritual side, my sexual orientation, my opinions and thoughts. I had always believed that society, friends and family had kept me from living my truth. But I am now learning the truth; I had created those barriers for myself throughout the years. In part, witnessing others who have broken out of their shell and seeing their struggles firsthand, it frightened me, and that fear created a mask that I hid behind for so many years…

I have no regrets, but If I could go back in time, I would tell myself this;

“Do not be afraid to be yourself, it will unlock true happiness.”

Tracy

Additionally, I learned based on my life and personality numbers in numerology my lessons to overcome in this lifetime will include the following;

“If we had to describe number two in a word, that word would be cooperation. These people are the best negotiators – they meditate and bring balance and harmony to all situations. They are gentle and cautious. They think of everything and try not to hurt anyone, choosing their words carefully and putting things together meticulously to create a harmonious whole. These are the true diplomats and peacemakers. Number two isn’t pushy by nature; they stand aside because they feel more comfortable in the background, preferring to avoid the spotlight. The very thought of being the center of attention makes them feel uncomfortable and nervous. They can be indispensable as the person who keeps everything together. It isn’t wise to give number two a leading role because of their indecisive nature and desire to please everyone. They are the hidden engine that runs the machine.

Their second great strength is their adaptability. Number two can take on other peoples’ qualities and hiding their true self behind a mask. They resort to this when they want to reconcile the irreconcilable because that’s something only, they can do. However, they should be careful, because they may become confused when playing a role and, in time, become uncertain of their own identity, as well as confusing those around them. They effortlessly take on the traits of others and it is in their nature to try to please everyone.

Number two is selfless, full of love and consideration, always standing up for peace. They are a true friend and would give everything for those close to them. Their family is particularly important to them. Also, number two represents the principle of motherhood. It’s essential that women carrying number two realize themselves in the maternal role. It is then that they try their best because family comes first. Two is the number of partnerships, regardless of whether that partnership is a friendship or an emotional or business relationship. They need a partner, someone to lead them onto the right path. However, number two is born with some bad predispositions, mainly a possibility of bad endings. They easily imagine the worst outcomes and can be their own worst enemy. They are susceptible to outside influences – negative circumstances lead them to bad endings where they are subordinate to and dependent on others. Number two doesn’t like being in this position because then they become blocked, self-destructive, and negative. Therefore, it’s imperative that number two receives proper guidance. Otherwise, they won’t be able to get out of a bad situation on their own and will look for someone to rescue them.

Number two cares about what other people think so they often seek approval. They also expect to be praised. This brings the challenges that number two needs to overcome. They shouldn’t allow their mood to depend on others and they should accept that they won’t always receive praise for their work, even though they’ve earned it. They should look for happiness and success in themselves. If they rely on the approval of others, it can lift them to great heights, but it can also break them when that approval isn’t forthcoming. This is the most sensitive number and their moods fluctuate daily. If they could see the world through the eyes of other numbers, they would realize they experience it with more emotion. It will take years for them to understand this and to set limits. It’s unnecessary for them to give of them self so much, especially if their aim is to stay happy and healthy.

As they want to make everyone around them happy, number two gives themselves selflessly. They like to please those close to them, even when they aren’t expected to. They often aim too high and end up disappointed, which can cause them to change their attitude completely. Then they are overwhelmed with contempt and thoughtlessly abandon the person in question. They need to find a balance, to distance themselves from certain people and direct attention and love to themselves. They have artistic tendencies and like to daydream and fantasize.”

  1. You need to learn that you have an inexhaustible source of creativity within that you should share with the world. Through the act of creation, you gain happiness. This will solve many problems that you might believe have no solution.
  2. You need to enjoy the present and be happy with what is. Your restlessness may make it hard for you to stop and enjoy the moment.
  3. You should be more persistent in following through your ideas. You may jump from one project to another because you’ve lost interest in their current project, running in all directions without completing what you have begun.
  4. Excessive enthusiasm and optimism can be harmful to you. Be careful about what you say and who is listening. And avoid making promises you can’t keep. Don’t be too open toward everyone because your tendency to be direct is often misunderstood, despite your good intentions.
  5. Listen to your heart. You should find a way to recognize the whisper of your soul and get as close to it as possible because you go through life led by your heart.
  6. Learn to respect your life partner more. And be prepared to say “no” and avoid stressful situations to avoid emotional crashes.
  7. You need to remain cheerful and practice positive thinking;
  8. Be less doubtful about your abilities and realize that you don’t always have to be fully prepared. Otherwise, you will miss good opportunities.”

    – Numerology App

I have learned and applied many of these lessons listed above and I am currently working on others, it has really brought me perspective and clarity on the items I need to work on moving forward. If you would like to learn more on the subject matter please reach out to me, I would love to help in anyway I can.

This Full Moon Circle has been an opportunity for me to demonstrate my spirituality with my children, thanks to the help of my dear friend Ariane. I was a little hesitant at first, but I am happy with my decision in sharing this experience with them.

I smiled as I watched them join in and participate during the opening ceremony of the circle by smudging everyone with sage, they curiously observed her smudge the first person entering the circle and wanted to take part by smudging the others joining. Their curiosity and eagerness to learn was astounding, they were open and non judgmental. They learnt the importance of not holding onto emotions that no longer serve us.

I was amazed by their enthusiasm to participate and they retained the information that she discussed regarding the affects the moon has on our oceans. This was a perfect time to rid ourselves of emotions or experiences that are negative by nature in order to make way for positivity.

She then had us all write down three things (emotions, intentions, experiences etc…) we would like to let go, and then write down three items we would like to bring forth in this new cycle. Afterwards, we folded our papers and wrote down one positive word we would like to project out for the world. At the end of the circle, the kids closed the ceremony by blowing out the candles and made our way outside and burned the paper.

A Full Moon is the end of a cycle, just as the full moon has a gravitational pull and brings in the tide from the ocean to wash away any debris left on the shore, we can compare this to the gravitational pull inside our self to rid ourselves of negativity and clear our minds in order to bring in new positive emotions and experiences.

The Moon‘s Effect on Ocean Tides. The gravitational pull of the Moon and the Sun makes the water in the oceans bulge, causing a continuous change between high and low tide.


Bad Memories, New Beginnings…

Everyone needs a good cry, like I mean a very ugly, running makeup and snot kinda cry. The kind of crying that will make your eyes puffy for the next few days. It is honestly amazing for the soul; it has a way of cleansing our spiritual toxic emotions and thoughts we carry with us every day. It honestly surprises me every time to see and feel how much emotional toxic waste I let go of during a crying session. Now, granted I am already a very emotionally charged individual and can cry on a dime, but never the less it is important.

I was watching a Dog’s Journey with my husband and kids and had held my own during the 2/3 of the movie, but when they dog finally fulfilled his purpose and finally got to heaven, I became a blubbering mess.

My husband then turned to the kids and said

“awe look isn’t it the sweetest thing seeing your mother cry over a movie.”

After using about an entire roll of paper toilet (inside joke, my frenglish is really a huge part of my vocabulary) I looked at him and said

“I was not crying about the dog per say, but rather thinking about Tania and how she touched my life and so many lives by truly living her life purpose and helping so many children that she finally made her way to heaven to continue helping other souls that need her more now.”

All he did was smile and said “I know.”

It is so important to give yourself the opportunity for this kind of cleansing, it has helped me get through the toughest times in my life.

Life sometimes can become so overwhelming and we are often surrounded by so much negativity. Society, friends and even family bombard us with the constant feeling of not being a good enough; parent, friend, spouse, child, employee, business owner, etc… the list goes on.

It can easily suck you into a toxic spiral that never ends.

Once that began, I often found myself feeling sorry for myself and blaming everyone around me for the way I was feeling. I wrote the book on feeling sorry for myself for such a big part of my life that I was creating the constant emotional struggle instead of helping myself. I have to admit for a very long time I never notice this in myself, it had been something that others have brought to my attention, but of course being in that self-pity party of one I never came into the realization that I was self-sabotaging. As difficult as my best friend passing was, that event was the catalyst of my soul awakening.

Trust me when I say this, soul awakening is not a walk in the park… It is messy, depressing, high anxiety and includes so so so many outbursts.

For the past 3 years I have unpacked so much emotional baggage to fill an airport. Yet, on the other hand it has been the best 3 years of my life emotionally. I can honestly say I have not felt happier, you know that spark and joy you have as a child, that feeling of joy slowly starts to fade as we age and are subject to tainted people and experiences until that spark suddenly fades into nothing.

Well I had hit rock bottom and felt absolutely nothing, I had no hope for life, no more joy left inside of me.

It has not been easy and is a continuous journey, but I feel like more then ever I have regained my internal compass and it has equipped me more then ever on dealing with the baggage I had been carrying for so many years.

The trick is easy really… focusing on the positive, truly living in the moment and not allowing the dark clouds to surround your soul. But rather feeling the pain, hurt and sadness in the moment and then letting the wind blow that particular moment away like it does for dark clouds, by then allowing sunshine to fill the sky. This has been a total game changer for me.

Being an empath has really opened my eyes, especially since my awakening.

I have always been good at feeling other people’s emotions, but I am now starting to really see auras surrounding individuals. I can see their pain, fear, sadness, hatred, jealousy and their joy.

It is a blessing in disguise, it has helped me navigate social cues and advised me on how to approach certain individuals. But let me tell you, it can be very difficult at times and I have to be very careful to protect my emotional well-being because I am very susceptible to feeling the way they are feeling.

So, I do morning and nightly spiritual rituals in order to protect my mental state. Such as; visualizing a protective bubble surrounding me during the day that will act as a barrier to other negative individuals. Utilizing specific crystals and stones at home and at work. Or by taking a shower at night to wash away all negativity during that day. I find it very helpful to get into a ritual, it gives me time to focus on me and my emotional health.

Another great option is surrounding yourself with amazing people while sitting around the kitchen table and having honest and constructive communication, being heard is the greatest feeling in the world. But, being that sounding board for someone can be equally and if not more rewarding.

Conversations filled with coffee, wine and/or beer filled with tears and joy are key to reconnecting with your soul.